Have you seen Jack?

So if the whole God made woman out of Adam’s rib doesn’t do it for you, here’s another myth I like better:

God looked around and saw all that he had created and was pleased. That is, until he saw Jack sitting in a heap frying rocks. God checked his notes, blew a little more DNA in Jack’s direction, along with a list of chores to do, then left for vacation.

When God returned he looked everywhere for Adam and called him by name. God looked upon the birds of the air and among every animal of the earth, who were flying and roaming about as God had intended. But where, God wondered, was Jack?

God called the bank, checked Jack’s transactions, gasped, and froze everything.

When God finally found Jack he was in a Garden littered with seven pickup trucks, three boats drinking beer and grilling mammoth in a fire pit. God looked around, and then Jack spoke;

“Sorry boss, I accidently ran the serpent over backing in the Ford 350. And your note only said don’t eat the fruit, and well, I needed firewood for supper here. Wanna eat?”

And God was pissed. God checked his notes, grabbed his phone and called Oprah. Within three days  the Book of O arrived and things got better.

Happy Mother’s Day.

 

Kevin Lee

Author: Kevin Lee

In a nutshell, Kevin fesses up to the following: He’s a retired youth advocate-counselor, a blogger, writer, photographer, rower, Friends Minister, grandpa of six and married to a terrific woman for 43 years and counting!

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